The American Soul

Everybody Wants A Great Marriage Until It’s Time To Act Like It

Jesse Season 5 Episode 266

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If you’ve ever caught yourself thinking, “I’ve got nothing left to give,” but somehow still found time for a show, a scroll, or a hobby, this conversation lands close to home. I read Scripture and then tie it to the part of life where faith gets tested most: marriage, family, and the everyday relationships that rise or fall on what we repeatedly choose to do.

We start with the words of Jesus in Luke 6 about blessing, rejection, and reward, then move into Ephesians 5 and the hard, steady call to live out biblical marriage roles with sacrifice and respect. The theme I can’t shake is reciprocation. If I want a great friend, I have to be a great friend. If I want a strong marriage, I have to bring time, effort, affection, and attention, even when I’m tired. The “Golden Rule” is not a slogan here. It’s a practical plan for conflict, forgiveness, and rebuilding trust.

Along the way, I read more from Luke 6 on loving enemies, refusing a judgmental spirit, giving generously, and choosing compassion. I also touch on current events and history that expose the cost of evil and the need for courage, including a brief look at the 2008 Mumbai attacks and a Medal of Honor story that puts selfless action into perspective.

If you care about Christian living, Christian marriage advice, and Bible-based discipleship that reaches into real decisions, listen now. Subscribe, share the episode with a friend, and leave a review so more people can find the show.

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A Murder Case And Border Reality

Welcome And Opening Prayer

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Luke six verses twenty-two and twenty-three. What blessings await you when people hate you and exclude you and mock you and curse you as evil because you follow the Son of Man. When that happens, be happy. Yes, leap for joy. For a great reward awaits you in heaven. And remember, their ancestors treated the ancient prophets the same way. Talia Benward, January 4th, 2025, Toll County, Utah. 31-year-old woman was murdered, her body dumped in a remote area by Nestor Rocha Aguayo, a twice deported illegal immigrant from Mexico who had re-entered the U.S. illegally days prior. Hey folks. This is Jesse Cope back with another episode of the American Soul Podcast. Hope y'all are doing well, wherever y'all are, whatever part of the day you're in. Sure do appreciate you joining me here, giving me a little bit of your time and attention. I will try and use it wisely. For those of y'all who continue to share the podcast with others, tell others about it. Thank you for those of y'all who continue to pray for me and for the podcast. Thank you very much. Very grateful for your prayers. Father, thank you for today. Thank you for you, Father, and your Son Jesus Christ and your Holy Spirit. Thank you for your love and your mercy, your grace, and your forgiveness of sins. Thank you for the people that you put in our lives to encourage us and strengthen our faith.

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Thank you for the people who have come before us who have set such good examples to followers of your son. Help us to care for those who have less than we do. Help us to draw our country back to you and your son Jesus Christ.

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Bless those listening, Father, guide them. Surround them with your angels. Bless the marriages of those who are married, guide those who have children. And raising them to know you and your son.

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Give them patience and perseverance. Help us to be still before you, Father. To calm our souls and our spirits, to look to you for wisdom and guidance and courage.

Ephesians 5 On Marriage Roles

Reciprocation And Relationship Effort

Luke 6 And The Golden Rule

Psalm 67 And Seeking Good

Reviews And Monthly Support Request

Mumbai Attacks And Extremist Violence

Medal Of Honor Courage At Vicksburg

The Lord’s Prayer And Blessing

SPEAKER_01

Be with our leaders. From the president and vice president on down, our military, our law enforcement, firefighters, EMS, senators, representatives, admirals, generals. Be with them all, Lord. Keep them safe. Give them a strong faith. Be with their families. And God my word to your Son's name we pray. Amen. Marriage verse, Ephesians 5, 22 through 33. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church, his body of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands and everything. Husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body just as Christ does the church, for we are members of his body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery, but I'm talking about Christ in the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. I was talking to an acquaintance of mine that I've had for years and years. And we were talking about a number of different relationships in our lives, uh, people in general, not ours particular, but although ours in particular also. And I think the older I get, folks, the more the word pops into my mind as reciprocation. You have to put the same amount of energy and effort and time and affection and attention into a relationship that you won in return. If you want to be good friends, if you want to be great friends, if you want to be decent friends, whatever that level is that you're looking for, right? If you want a great friend, you've got to be a great friend. If you want really good kids, you've got to be a really good parent. If you want to be a if you want a great husband or wife, you've got to be a great husband or wife. You you have to put that same amount of energy, time, affection, attention, and that's no guarantee that that other person is going to reciprocate it, but there's definitely a guarantee that if you don't, that it's going to cause problems. There's going to be a breakdown in that relationship, that friendship, that parent-child relationship, that spousal relationship. And again, the spouse is the only one where God tells us to cleave, to become one flesh with another person. Right. If you want your spouse to follow their God-given roles and reciprocate, you know, roles and responsibilities eagerly, then you have to follow yours. And so often we make the excuse, oh, I'm tired, I'm worn out, I don't have time, I don't have energy. And then we watch a movie for two hours, or we listen to a book for two hours, or we watch a TV show for hours on end, or we scroll social media for hours on end, or we work out, or we hang out with our friends for hours on end. We have all of these excuses. And it doesn't matter what your stage is, folks. It doesn't matter if you're newly married and you have five kids, or if you're 70 years old and you've been married for 50 years. We seem to just be so eager and so adept at making these excuses. And what it really just turns into is we just don't want to do our job. We want our spouse to. We want our kids to. We want our friends to, but we don't want to do ours. And particularly, again, your spouse. You know, it's uh I deal, I have the privilege of dealing with kids a lot in sports. And you have so many kids that'll tell you they want to be great. Um, and I and I think we put way too much effort on youth sports today in America anyway, so this that's a whole different conversation, but it's still a good example. You have so many kids say they they want to be great, they want to be a D1 athlete, a Division I college athlete, they want to be a professional athlete, they want to be whatever, but they don't put the time in. They're not really dedicated to it. They want the results, they don't want the work, the responsibility. Uh, I've said this on the podcast a number of times in the past. It reminds me of a comment by a player for the Houston Texans, I think, JJ Watts, Watts, something like that, NFL player anyway. And they were following him around doing a workout one day. I'm taking way too much of the podcast, but it's it's a huge deal, folks. And he said, uh, everybody wants to be a beast until it's time to do what beasts have to do in order to be a beast. And I know the vernacular, the vocabulary is not great there, but you get the point. Everybody wants the results until it's time to put in the work. And I think you see that perhaps most prevalently inside the church in our marriages today. Luke 6, 12 through 38. One day soon afterward, Jesus went up on a mountain to pray, and he prayed to God all night. At daybreak, he called together all of his disciples and chose twelve of them to be apostles. Here are their names. Simon, whom he named Peter, Andrew, Peter's brother, James, John, Philip, Bartholomew, Matthew, Thomas, James, the son of Alpheus, Simon, who was called the Zealot, Judas, son of James, Judas Iscariot, who later betrayed him. When they came down from the mountain, the disciples stood with Jesus on a large level area, surrounded by many of his fellow followers and by the crowds. There were people from all over Judea and from Jerusalem, and as far north as the sea coasts of Tyr and Sidon. They had come to hear him and to be healed of their diseases. And those troubled by evil spirits were healed. Everyone tried to touch him because healing power went out from him, and he healed everyone. Then Jesus turned to his disciples and said, God blesses you who are poor, for the kingdom of God is yours. God blesses you who are hungry now, for you will be satisfied. God blesses you who weep now, for in due time you will laugh. What blessings await you when people hate you and exclude you and mock you and curse you as evil because you follow the Son of Man? When that happens, be happy, yes leap for joy, for a great reward awaits you in heaven. And remember their ancestors treated the ancient prophets in the same way. What sorrow awaits you who are rich? For you have had your only happiness now. What sorrow awaits you who are fat and prosperous now, for a time of awful hunger awaits you? What sorrow awaits you who laugh now, for your laughing will turn to mourning and sorrow? What sorrow awaits you who are praised by the crowds, for their ancestors also praised false prophets. But to you who are willing to listen, I say, Love your enemies. Do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who hurt you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. Give to anyone who asks, and when things are taken away from you, don't try to get them back. Do to others as you would like them to do to you. That pretty much sums up our marriage commentary. If you love only those who love you, why should you get any credit for that? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you get any credit? Even sinners do that much. And if you lend money only to those who can repay you, why should you get credit? Even sinners will lend to other sinners for a full return. Love your enemies, do good to them, lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the most high, for he is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked. You must be compassionate just as your father is compassionate. How often I fail at that, folks. Do not judge others and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others or it will all come back against you. Forgive others and you will be forgiven. Give and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full. Press down, shaken together to make room for more, running over and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back. Psalm sixty seven verses one through seven. May God be merciful and bless us, may his face smile with favor on us. May your ways be known throughout the earth, your saving power among people everywhere. May the nations praise you, O God, yes, may all the nations praise you. Let the whole world sing for joy, because you govern the nations with justice and guide the people of the whole world. May the nations praise you, O God, yes, may all the nations praise you. Then the earth will yield its harvests, and God, our God, will richly bless us. Yes, God will bless us, and people all over the world will fear Him. Proverbs 1127. If you search for good, you will find favor, but if you search for evil, it will find you. Amen to that. Countryside, if you are looking for a family-friendly middle grade read, middle grade fantasy, if you would check out the countryside series, I would appreciate it. And if you enjoy it, if you would leave a review somewhere online, those help immensely, especially the five-star ones. Same thing for the podcast. If you are getting something out of it, if you would leave a review somewhere, and if you have five or ten dollars a month you can spare, there's a link in the show notes where you can set up that monthly donation. And I would be very grateful for that. November 26th to 29th, 2008, in Mumbai, Mumbai, India, uh, 10 gunmen from the Muslim group Lashkar E. Taiba, I think, uh launched a coordinated four-day siege, storming Luxury Hotels, Taj Mahal Palace, and Obero Trident, uh, train station, Jewish community center, and other sites, automatic weapons, grenades, arson. The attackers killed 166 people, including 28 foreigners from 10 countries, and injured over 300 others in a rampage of shootings, hostage taking, and bombings before Indian commandos ended the assault. It's important to note how many different countries these victims come from each time, folks, because it reinforces the point that the problem is Islam. And it's also important to note that the ethnicity is often different for these groups of terrorists. They're not from the same countries, they're from different countries. The common denominator is Islam. They don't care what your ethnicity is, they don't care what your skin color is, they don't care about anything other than the good ones, right? The good Muslims, about following the Quran and Muhammad, and it constantly leads to chaos, violence. And you see it again and again. Medal of Honor. I think that's all we're going to have time for today. Uh private, this is Uriah H. Brown, highest rank corporal, U.S. Civil War, Gulf Company, 30th Ohio Infantry, U.S. Army, May 22nd, 1863, Vicksburg, Mississippi, USA. Despite the death of his captain at his side during the assault, he continued carrying his log to the defense ditch. While he was laying his log in place, he was shot down and thrown into the water. Unmindful of his own wound, he, despite the intense fire, dragged five of his comrades from the ditch wherein they lay wounded to a place of safety. Credited to Steubenville, Jefferson County, Ohio, not awarded posthumously, presented August 15, 1894. Born July 4th, 1841, Covington, Miami County, Ohio, died January 24, 1927, Holiday Cove, West Virginia, buried Paris Cemetery, Paris, Pennsylvania. Uriah H. Brown. Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not to temptation, but deliver us from evil for the highness the kingdom and the power and the glory forever and ever. Amen. God bless y'all, your families, your marriages, your nation, wherever you are. God bless America. We'll talk to you all again real soon, folks. Looking forward to it.